just putting a personal update here cuz i really been going through it
i just got whanged over the head with seasonal depression like… sometime last fall, and it feels like i’ve lost months of my life. like, days have been burning by without me even noticing, i’ve gotten behind on so much i want to do, i’ve accomplished so little
i’m financially wrecked, as usual, and desperately searching for a job with no luck
i still drive for bitesquad, but they discontinued their company fleet and now require drivers to use their own cars. paying for gas and having to deal with the wear and tear on my car makes this job barely worth it
i could be doing so much better financially if i could scrape myself up enough to do commissions, but it’s just so hard to take the first step when you constantly feel miserable and hopeless and scared
summer brings better mood days for me. i’m really learning that about myself. i can get a lot more done in the summer but fall and winter are really really hard for me
i’m about to move into a new house which is exciting! i’m trying to revitalize my online presence which is daunting. i think once i’ve caught up on backlogged work/commissions/etc i am going to try launching a youtube channel? we’ll see how that goes
also snakeladders. it’s another one of those things that just seems too huge to overcome but it wont be right until i get there
but yeah lol, depression is shit, try to avoid it if you can